1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,319 Previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons. 2 00:00:02,319 --> 00:00:08,080 Suddenly, the room was filled with an unexpected ice storm. Seems weird. 3 00:00:08,080 --> 00:00:13,280 As you squint through the haze, you see four figures standing on a tucked-away balcony. 4 00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:18,800 Surprised to see you made it this far. I shall deliver you and the traitorous Iskander to him myself. 5 00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:21,039 Remember that he has a fire breath weapon? 6 00:00:21,039 --> 00:00:27,920 So Donnie lets forth his flame breath and, uh, chars the first one. 7 00:00:27,920 --> 00:00:30,080 He's up in flames, running around. 8 00:00:30,080 --> 00:00:34,320 I see him, like, frantically trying to pat himself out while he's on fire, 9 00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:37,600 and I aim for just what I think should be his head region. 10 00:00:38,400 --> 00:00:39,359 His name was Harold. 11 00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:41,040 Oh, well. 12 00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:42,000 He had a family. 13 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:47,600 And then you see him vanish and then reappear up on top of the balcony, 14 00:00:47,600 --> 00:00:53,600 and a fireball begins to form in his hands that he releases down towards Donnie Noir and Thea. 15 00:00:53,600 --> 00:00:56,719 But that fireball's like one of those super slow fireballs, 16 00:00:56,719 --> 00:00:58,479 so it takes like three turns to get there. 17 00:00:58,479 --> 00:01:03,039 And then you release your dwarven thrower and it connects square in his sternum, 18 00:01:03,039 --> 00:01:08,480 and he, like, grabs onto it, but the dwarven thrower pulls him back with it. 19 00:01:08,480 --> 00:01:10,159 Oh, that's a mistake, yeah. 20 00:01:10,159 --> 00:01:14,079 Into the room, he bounces off the telescope and falls to the ground. 21 00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:16,400 Oh, like that guy in Titanic. 22 00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:22,960 Lara and Thaddeus, you feel drawn to a dagger. 23 00:01:22,960 --> 00:01:26,880 If you give me to her, we will never be able to be friends again. 24 00:01:26,880 --> 00:01:31,520 Thaddeus, I really, I just, I've never asked you for anything before. 25 00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:34,080 I just want the dagger. 26 00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:35,600 Can't you just give it to me? 27 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:38,480 I, no, no, it's my dagger. 28 00:01:38,480 --> 00:01:42,240 Thea begins to run towards you, but she's not fast enough. 29 00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:46,800 In the moment that he hands the weapon to you and you drive it into his chest, 30 00:01:48,080 --> 00:01:51,040 and it goes through his armor into his heart. 31 00:01:53,520 --> 00:01:55,280 Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons. 32 00:01:55,280 --> 00:01:57,680 We're a D&D fifth edition Actual Play podcast, 33 00:01:57,680 --> 00:02:01,920 and I'm your dungeon master Russ More, and with me today is Amy More. 34 00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:04,080 I love sparkles. 35 00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:08,080 I'm Amy More, and I play Thea Amastasia. 36 00:02:08,879 --> 00:02:11,280 Also with us today, Carla Johnson. 37 00:02:12,879 --> 00:02:15,840 I've decided to take a heel turn. 38 00:02:15,840 --> 00:02:19,120 Apparently, I play Lara Moonbrook. 39 00:02:19,200 --> 00:02:24,240 And with us also, Tom Laird. 40 00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:26,240 What? 41 00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:29,200 I am indifferent towards sparkles. 42 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:30,159 They're fine. 43 00:02:30,159 --> 00:02:31,439 I could take them or leave them. 44 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:33,599 Oh, and I play Flynn Firebeard. 45 00:02:33,599 --> 00:02:34,719 How's everybody doing? 46 00:02:36,080 --> 00:02:36,560 Whatever. 47 00:02:37,520 --> 00:02:38,080 Yep. 48 00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:39,120 I'll concur with that. 49 00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:39,599 Whatever. 50 00:02:39,599 --> 00:02:40,099 Yep. 51 00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:46,640 One of our own was hurt last episode, and it's still pretty raw. 52 00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:50,640 Apparently, last week left a poor taste in people's mouths. 53 00:02:50,640 --> 00:02:51,360 I don't get it. 54 00:02:51,360 --> 00:02:53,920 Russ, we are stressed out to the max. 55 00:02:53,920 --> 00:02:58,000 There's a missing fucking owl, and now this shit is going on. 56 00:02:58,560 --> 00:02:59,920 I mean, come on. 57 00:02:59,920 --> 00:03:01,120 These are bad people. 58 00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:02,480 Hashtag fine guac. 59 00:03:02,480 --> 00:03:03,440 Hashtag fine guac. 60 00:03:04,320 --> 00:03:06,400 If you go to Twitter and put in hashtag fine guac, 61 00:03:06,400 --> 00:03:08,320 there's a whole movement going on. 62 00:03:08,320 --> 00:03:08,880 I love it. 63 00:03:08,880 --> 00:03:10,960 People threatening to not listen to the podcast, 64 00:03:10,960 --> 00:03:14,000 but they keep coming back and saying that we haven't found guac yet. 65 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:17,520 So it's a tough one. 66 00:03:17,520 --> 00:03:20,639 I don't know how well it's like a three strike situation, 67 00:03:20,639 --> 00:03:22,319 like they're going to give you some chances, 68 00:03:22,319 --> 00:03:25,520 but you better fucking follow through on finding guac. 69 00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:28,639 I mean, we'll take us where the story takes us. 70 00:03:28,639 --> 00:03:30,560 Well, maybe when we do find guac, 71 00:03:30,560 --> 00:03:32,879 she could be like, you're the one now, dog. 72 00:03:35,439 --> 00:03:37,439 It wasn't going to be, but now it is. 73 00:03:37,439 --> 00:03:39,680 No, it needs to be a wonderful reunion. 74 00:03:39,680 --> 00:03:41,280 Oh, God, I hope there's a reunion. 75 00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:42,719 Oh, God. 76 00:03:43,520 --> 00:03:45,280 Sean Connery is. 77 00:03:45,280 --> 00:03:46,400 Yeah, I get it. 78 00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:46,879 It's good. 79 00:03:48,960 --> 00:03:50,400 Where you can get more of us, 80 00:03:50,400 --> 00:03:52,639 Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast, 81 00:03:52,639 --> 00:03:54,479 where people will be less angry at me. 82 00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:56,000 Oh, I don't know. 83 00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:59,439 For the most part, true. 84 00:03:59,439 --> 00:04:01,759 I mean, I don't know. 85 00:04:01,759 --> 00:04:03,199 And when you're a patron of ours, 86 00:04:03,199 --> 00:04:05,199 you get an episode dedicated to you. 87 00:04:05,199 --> 00:04:10,400 Like today's dedication is the one and only Daryl Johnson. 88 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:11,039 Yeah, Daryl. 89 00:04:11,039 --> 00:04:12,079 Thanks, Daryl. 90 00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:13,520 I know that guy. 91 00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:14,640 I know that guy. 92 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:15,600 That's all I'm going to say. 93 00:04:19,920 --> 00:04:20,420 All right. 94 00:04:21,680 --> 00:04:23,520 Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast, 95 00:04:23,520 --> 00:04:24,960 you can ask Daryl for yourself. 96 00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:27,840 He doesn't want to be associated with me right now, probably, 97 00:04:27,840 --> 00:04:30,480 because I don't want to be associated with me right now. 98 00:04:31,520 --> 00:04:32,800 Yeah, yeah. 99 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:36,000 Another way you can support us is you can rate and review us on iTunes. 100 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:37,040 We appreciate that. 101 00:04:37,680 --> 00:04:41,040 It helps all podcasts grow and get in front of more people. 102 00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:42,400 It's a fantastic thing. 103 00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:45,040 And if you call Russ a doink in your review, 104 00:04:45,040 --> 00:04:46,800 we will read it in the podcast. 105 00:04:46,800 --> 00:04:48,560 Yeah, we will doink it. 106 00:04:48,560 --> 00:04:50,879 That'd be so great. 107 00:04:51,680 --> 00:04:56,080 Yeah, if you call me a doink in the review, 108 00:04:56,080 --> 00:04:57,920 we will read it in the podcast. 109 00:04:57,920 --> 00:04:59,360 I laughed out loud for that. 110 00:05:03,280 --> 00:05:05,920 When the episode title came up, you doink, 111 00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:08,400 I like fully laughed out loud, 112 00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:10,160 because of course Russ makes those up. 113 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:11,439 We don't know what they're going to be. 114 00:05:11,439 --> 00:05:12,480 Oh, my God. 115 00:05:12,480 --> 00:05:14,240 What a delight that was, Russ. 116 00:05:14,240 --> 00:05:15,439 It was a delight. 117 00:05:15,439 --> 00:05:17,040 I thought it was so funny. 118 00:05:17,040 --> 00:05:19,120 By far the best thing I've ever said on the podcast. 119 00:05:20,640 --> 00:05:22,480 I mean, it was up there if it wasn't. 120 00:05:22,480 --> 00:05:23,520 It was a wife thing. 121 00:05:26,320 --> 00:05:27,200 It resounded. 122 00:05:29,040 --> 00:05:30,000 Everybody loved it. 123 00:05:30,879 --> 00:05:31,920 Everybody loved it. 124 00:05:33,360 --> 00:05:33,760 Fuck it. 125 00:05:33,760 --> 00:05:34,720 Let's play D&D. 126 00:05:35,120 --> 00:05:35,620 Yeah. 127 00:05:39,040 --> 00:05:46,400 We find Nulara standing with a dagger in the chest of Thaddeus 128 00:05:47,840 --> 00:05:53,440 as he begins coughing and he grabs at Nulara 129 00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:57,760 and he's got this look of why on his face. 130 00:05:57,760 --> 00:05:58,880 What's everybody else doing? 131 00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:03,760 Dying a little on the inside. 132 00:06:05,600 --> 00:06:11,680 Nulara, you hear in your mind of mine a voice and it says, 133 00:06:12,480 --> 00:06:17,280 yes, yes, you will do to return me to my master. 134 00:06:17,280 --> 00:06:18,960 Let's have some fun, shall we? 135 00:06:20,960 --> 00:06:24,320 And you pull the dagger out and quickly sheath it on your belt. 136 00:06:25,440 --> 00:06:26,880 I say, Nulara, what the fuck? 137 00:06:27,760 --> 00:06:30,080 Thaddeus, oh, my God, are you? 138 00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:32,240 Oh, my God. 139 00:06:32,319 --> 00:06:34,400 And I'm like, I guess, going to try and like, 140 00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:37,439 take his armor off to like, get to the wound. 141 00:06:37,439 --> 00:06:38,319 Make a medicine check. 142 00:06:40,079 --> 00:06:41,519 Yeah, that's a skill I have. 143 00:06:41,519 --> 00:06:42,000 It's not. 144 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:42,560 That's one. 145 00:06:42,560 --> 00:06:43,120 Totally one. 146 00:06:43,120 --> 00:06:44,639 Everybody has some. 147 00:06:44,639 --> 00:06:48,000 Oh, I actually, I'm fucking baller with medicine, you guys. 148 00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:50,800 Been holding, holding out on you this whole time. 149 00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:52,560 25. 150 00:06:52,560 --> 00:06:53,280 Oh, my God. 151 00:06:54,319 --> 00:06:54,639 Yeah, all right. 152 00:06:54,639 --> 00:06:57,360 She fucking performs open heart surgery, saves his life. 153 00:06:59,360 --> 00:07:00,560 Fixes him right up. 154 00:07:00,560 --> 00:07:02,879 You managed to quickly get his armor off. 155 00:07:02,879 --> 00:07:05,280 And you're everybody's kind of watching you do this, 156 00:07:05,280 --> 00:07:07,680 as they just saw you stab him. 157 00:07:07,680 --> 00:07:10,399 And now you're taking his armor off and bandaging him up 158 00:07:10,399 --> 00:07:13,600 and applying pressure to the wound. 159 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:14,959 Is he still alive? 160 00:07:14,959 --> 00:07:19,279 He's just like, yeah, OK, then I am going to give him 161 00:07:20,160 --> 00:07:25,279 my last rare healing potion that I was going to use on my own dying ass self. 162 00:07:26,160 --> 00:07:27,759 But I'm going to give it to him. 163 00:07:27,759 --> 00:07:30,000 Nulara, what the fuck? 164 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:31,199 He drinks the potion. 165 00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:34,800 Lara, you see the wound begin to close, 166 00:07:34,800 --> 00:07:38,240 so it's the potion is taking effect and it looks like it's working. 167 00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:39,360 Thaddeus, what happened? 168 00:07:39,360 --> 00:07:40,079 Oh, my God. 169 00:07:40,079 --> 00:07:41,120 How did you even get hurt? 170 00:07:41,120 --> 00:07:42,720 I thought that we beat these guys. 171 00:07:45,279 --> 00:07:46,639 You stabbed me. 172 00:07:47,199 --> 00:07:48,319 I stabbed you. 173 00:07:48,319 --> 00:07:49,360 Are you delirious? 174 00:07:49,360 --> 00:07:50,800 What are you talking about? 175 00:07:50,800 --> 00:07:54,319 As, yeah, Flint's walking over there is like, yeah, dude, you stabbed him. 176 00:07:55,120 --> 00:07:56,560 What are you guys talking about? 177 00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:57,759 Why would I stab him? 178 00:07:57,759 --> 00:08:00,319 It's a great question. 179 00:08:00,319 --> 00:08:01,360 It's a great question. 180 00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:01,839 Any thoughts? 181 00:08:01,839 --> 00:08:03,839 Fighting over that fucking knife. 182 00:08:03,839 --> 00:08:07,039 You guys were fighting over that dagger and you took it away from him 183 00:08:07,039 --> 00:08:09,199 and then you fucking stabbed him with it. 184 00:08:09,199 --> 00:08:09,920 What dagger? 185 00:08:09,920 --> 00:08:11,599 What are you even talking about? 186 00:08:11,599 --> 00:08:13,120 The one that's in your belt. 187 00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:18,800 Can I snatch it like from her scabbard daggers going scabbards? 188 00:08:18,800 --> 00:08:19,599 Yes, you can try. 189 00:08:19,599 --> 00:08:20,079 Yeah. 190 00:08:20,079 --> 00:08:21,039 Yeah, I want to try that. 191 00:08:21,039 --> 00:08:22,639 Make a dex. 192 00:08:22,639 --> 00:08:23,519 I'm going to fucking roll. 193 00:08:24,879 --> 00:08:25,920 I'm going to do a dex roll. 194 00:08:25,920 --> 00:08:27,360 It's going to be the best thing ever. 195 00:08:27,360 --> 00:08:31,600 Can I roll two d20s and just add them together to get my lesson 10 number? 196 00:08:31,600 --> 00:08:34,000 Let's say you roll with advantage because she doesn't know what you're doing. 197 00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:36,480 You're just quickly trying to do this without her knowledge. 198 00:08:36,480 --> 00:08:38,399 Okay, well, I just legit roll the one. 199 00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:40,560 Excellent. 200 00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:42,320 Maybe roll your other one. 201 00:08:42,320 --> 00:08:43,120 It's going to go up. 202 00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:46,320 It was a 16 plus two, 18 plus one. 203 00:08:47,759 --> 00:08:48,720 Sorry, 17. 204 00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:50,240 So you are still wolf. 205 00:08:50,240 --> 00:08:53,440 So you're trying to grab it from the handle and pull it out of her belt? 206 00:08:54,000 --> 00:09:00,720 I think I'm trying to rip the leather belt buckle loop shit right off of her. 207 00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:02,960 I don't think I could be very precision. 208 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,440 I don't think I'm lifting it out by the handle. 209 00:09:05,440 --> 00:09:09,200 I think I'm grabbing hold of the whole scabbard and just ripping. 210 00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:09,520 Sure. 211 00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:15,600 So you bite into the scabbard and you see a red glow come from the gems 212 00:09:16,800 --> 00:09:21,440 and it doesn't move and you take four damage. 213 00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:23,120 Do I drop it? 214 00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:23,919 Did I take it off? 215 00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:30,960 Where you grabbed it, it doesn't come out or come off. 216 00:09:30,960 --> 00:09:36,399 I kind of like yelp a bit as I'm assuming burns my mouth. 217 00:09:37,759 --> 00:09:41,039 And I say that take that off. 218 00:09:41,039 --> 00:09:42,159 Take that off, Nularaaa. 219 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:44,799 That thing's evil. 220 00:09:46,320 --> 00:09:48,399 Okay, well, I grab it and try and take it off. 221 00:09:48,399 --> 00:09:49,519 It doesn't remove. 222 00:09:51,120 --> 00:09:52,480 Nularaaa, seriously, take it off. 223 00:09:53,919 --> 00:09:57,759 But am I like, you can see me trying to move it and it just won't move? 224 00:09:59,279 --> 00:10:02,080 But maybe you're really good at pantomiming a struggle. 225 00:10:04,879 --> 00:10:07,519 So I'm pulling on it. 226 00:10:07,519 --> 00:10:10,480 Guys, I can't move it. 227 00:10:10,480 --> 00:10:13,600 Well, Nularaaa is never getting naked again, you guys, apparently. 228 00:10:14,159 --> 00:10:16,080 Well, I'll always have a belt on. 229 00:10:16,080 --> 00:10:16,560 Weird. 230 00:10:17,039 --> 00:10:17,539 Apparently. 231 00:10:18,320 --> 00:10:20,159 Fine, we can have sex, but I'm leaving my belt on. 232 00:10:23,200 --> 00:10:24,080 And my socks. 233 00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:27,600 Okay, Thaddeus, are you all right? 234 00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:32,799 Do you know anything about, I don't know, evil bewitched daggers? 235 00:10:33,919 --> 00:10:34,419 Nope. 236 00:10:37,679 --> 00:10:38,480 Do I know anything? 237 00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:40,399 Can I roll a history check? 238 00:10:40,399 --> 00:10:41,120 Oh, I know fucking nothing. 239 00:10:41,120 --> 00:10:42,159 Maybe I might know something. 240 00:10:43,600 --> 00:10:45,840 Yeah, everybody who wants to can make a history check. 241 00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:46,799 Well, I rolled a three. 242 00:10:48,639 --> 00:10:49,600 I think history's for twice. 243 00:10:49,600 --> 00:10:50,720 That's a 26. 244 00:10:51,279 --> 00:10:52,639 I rolled a 20. 245 00:10:52,639 --> 00:10:56,720 Nularaaa, you're trying to remove the dagger and you're kind of looking at it. 246 00:10:56,720 --> 00:11:03,120 And what you can see is, because the blade won't remove from the scabbard, 247 00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:12,000 you see an ebony crossguard which seamlessly flows into a worn leather wrapped handle. 248 00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:16,080 There are two red garnet stones. 249 00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:18,960 I did say gems last time, but they're red garnet stones. 250 00:11:19,680 --> 00:11:25,519 I don't think you know about this specific dagger, even with a 26. 251 00:11:28,800 --> 00:11:32,639 Guys, help me, like, try to get this thing off of me. 252 00:11:36,400 --> 00:11:41,759 I don't know if it burned Thea's mouth when she tried to bite it. 253 00:11:41,759 --> 00:11:43,200 You're not even going to try? 254 00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:44,560 Cut my belt off me. 255 00:11:44,560 --> 00:11:45,519 Jesus, you guys. 256 00:11:46,319 --> 00:11:49,279 This thing just made me stab Thaddeus, is what you're telling me, 257 00:11:49,279 --> 00:11:50,960 and you're not going to try and get it away from me? 258 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,000 Get it away from me. 259 00:11:52,639 --> 00:11:54,799 I don't have hands, it's all you, Flint. 260 00:11:55,679 --> 00:12:00,480 As Flint is approaching you to try and cut off the belt, 261 00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:02,480 Nularaaa, you hear in your head, 262 00:12:03,439 --> 00:12:06,240 if he removes me and we are separated, 263 00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:09,439 something will happen to one of your friends. 264 00:12:11,759 --> 00:12:13,039 And then the voice goes away. 265 00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:17,199 Uh, so I guess I just start to back away from him. 266 00:12:19,199 --> 00:12:20,319 Nularaaa, what are you doing? 267 00:12:20,319 --> 00:12:21,199 Hold still. 268 00:12:21,199 --> 00:12:23,199 How's he supposed to get that off you if you keep moving? 269 00:12:24,399 --> 00:12:31,759 Guys, I can hear, this seems crazy, but I can hear the dagger in my head, 270 00:12:31,759 --> 00:12:34,319 and it's saying something bad is going to happen to one of you 271 00:12:35,039 --> 00:12:36,879 if it's separated from me. 272 00:12:38,639 --> 00:12:42,159 I mean, it already used you to stab Thaddeus. 273 00:12:42,159 --> 00:12:43,439 What worse could happen to us? 274 00:12:44,879 --> 00:12:47,759 That seems like a risky fucking thing to ask. 275 00:12:47,759 --> 00:12:48,879 What worse could happen? 276 00:12:48,879 --> 00:12:52,159 We've just been in a death maze for like nine and a half months. 277 00:12:53,039 --> 00:12:54,000 Fair point, fair point. 278 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:54,480 It's noted. 279 00:12:55,279 --> 00:12:58,959 Nularaaa, you hear the voice come back and it says, 280 00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:03,519 yes, yes, he was weak, but he looks fine now. 281 00:13:04,319 --> 00:13:08,639 Guys, this dagger is evil. 282 00:13:08,639 --> 00:13:11,679 It's so evil, it's happy that I stabbed Thaddeus. 283 00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:13,680 Of course it made me stab him. 284 00:13:13,680 --> 00:13:15,600 I didn't think it would regret it now, but. 285 00:13:17,120 --> 00:13:18,400 It really takes it back down. 286 00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:19,360 It's like, oh, you know what? 287 00:13:19,360 --> 00:13:20,080 It should have done that. 288 00:13:20,080 --> 00:13:21,120 It was a step too far. 289 00:13:21,840 --> 00:13:25,040 But Nularaaa, if we don't try to separate you from it, 290 00:13:26,240 --> 00:13:28,240 you might just end up stabbing one of us again. 291 00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:32,480 But if we do try to separate you from it, something bad's going to happen. 292 00:13:34,160 --> 00:13:34,720 I guess. 293 00:13:35,760 --> 00:13:38,000 This is like the epitome of rock in a hard place, isn't it? 294 00:13:39,200 --> 00:13:40,080 What does it want? 295 00:13:42,480 --> 00:13:44,160 I don't know. 296 00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:46,880 Dagger, what do you want? 297 00:13:49,680 --> 00:13:51,360 I roll my wolf eyes at her. 298 00:13:51,360 --> 00:13:54,960 I roll my wolfy eyes at her like, you give me this attitude now. 299 00:13:55,920 --> 00:13:59,040 What I want will become clear soon. 300 00:13:59,840 --> 00:14:02,080 We will just have some fun in the meantime. 301 00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:05,600 Is it talking to you? 302 00:14:07,760 --> 00:14:08,560 Yes, it said. 303 00:14:08,560 --> 00:14:15,120 What it wants will become clear soon, but in the meantime, we'll have some fun. 304 00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:16,960 What? 305 00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:18,320 That sounds fucking ominous. 306 00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:20,560 So I think. 307 00:14:22,880 --> 00:14:25,360 Not that we don't trust you, Nularaaa. 308 00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:26,560 You shouldn't trust me. 309 00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:28,640 I literally just stabbed Thaddeus. 310 00:14:28,640 --> 00:14:29,600 Fucking help me. 311 00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:31,920 Guys, help me. 312 00:14:31,920 --> 00:14:33,920 Make me not do anything bad again. 313 00:14:33,920 --> 00:14:35,440 I don't want this to happen again. 314 00:14:37,120 --> 00:14:38,480 Can we tie our hands together? 315 00:14:39,200 --> 00:14:42,080 You hear in your head, Nularaaa. 316 00:14:42,080 --> 00:14:46,560 If you don't try to get rid of me, I won't make you hurt your friends again. 317 00:14:46,560 --> 00:14:47,279 Don't worry. 318 00:14:48,320 --> 00:14:52,720 It says if I don't try and get rid of it, it won't make me hurt you again. 319 00:14:54,399 --> 00:14:57,600 But I still think you need to stop me. 320 00:14:58,240 --> 00:15:00,000 Like you can't leave it as an option. 321 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:04,159 That is a like legit abusive relationship you have with that knife. 322 00:15:08,639 --> 00:15:09,120 I don't know. 323 00:15:09,680 --> 00:15:15,759 I think maybe you should walk first and we will constantly have our eyes on you. 324 00:15:15,759 --> 00:15:17,039 I don't know what else we can do. 325 00:15:18,240 --> 00:15:21,519 We need to be all together on this to get ourselves out of this. 326 00:15:24,080 --> 00:15:29,120 I don't know if we can afford to tie you up and drag you behind us. 327 00:15:32,320 --> 00:15:34,639 Thaddeus casts Zone of Truth. 328 00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:37,279 OK. 329 00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:44,639 And asks that dagger some fucking questions. 330 00:15:46,159 --> 00:15:47,920 Thea just blurs out. 331 00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:50,080 I like to take shits in people's shoes when I'm a wolf. 332 00:15:54,480 --> 00:15:54,879 Hold on. 333 00:15:54,879 --> 00:15:56,960 There's a saving throw with Zone of Truth. 334 00:15:56,960 --> 00:15:57,600 So whatever. 335 00:16:01,039 --> 00:16:03,039 She spills all her deepest darkest secrets. 336 00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:06,720 So it's just against his Spell Save DC there. 337 00:16:07,440 --> 00:16:10,000 And Flame Bekins probably has to tell the truth too. 338 00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:11,759 I know everything. 339 00:16:11,759 --> 00:16:12,639 I don't know what's happening. 340 00:16:13,200 --> 00:16:14,560 Spell Save DC 16. 341 00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:16,560 You don't really know. 342 00:16:17,120 --> 00:16:22,399 You got to ask like some leading questions to figure out who saved and who failed and whatever. 343 00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:24,160 Yeah right. 344 00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:27,920 Because we're not like I'm feeling in a truthful mood. 345 00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:29,120 I could still be lying. 346 00:16:29,120 --> 00:16:30,160 It's like a riddle. 347 00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:30,480 Fuck. 348 00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:31,279 I don't know what to ask. 349 00:16:31,279 --> 00:16:31,920 What should I ask? 350 00:16:31,920 --> 00:16:32,639 What do I ask? 351 00:16:33,120 --> 00:16:37,600 Don't just go silent on me guys. 352 00:16:39,120 --> 00:16:39,919 I don't know, Tom. 353 00:16:39,919 --> 00:16:41,120 It's your choice here, man. 354 00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:42,399 What do you want to know? 355 00:16:43,519 --> 00:16:46,399 Well, yeah, as I say, I assume this thing was like its own 356 00:16:47,679 --> 00:16:51,759 being, not just an inanimate object that can talk. 357 00:16:51,759 --> 00:16:52,879 Well, I mean, you don't know. 358 00:16:52,879 --> 00:16:53,360 You don't know. 359 00:16:54,879 --> 00:16:55,439 I don't know. 360 00:16:55,439 --> 00:16:56,480 I think I know from you. 361 00:16:57,039 --> 00:17:01,680 Okay, you know, but who the sweet fattiest Thea Nularaaaa don't know. 362 00:17:01,680 --> 00:17:02,960 Flame McKinns doesn't know anything. 363 00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:04,799 Don't ask her. 364 00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:06,559 I won't tell you. 365 00:17:06,559 --> 00:17:07,440 Even if I knew. 366 00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:08,240 I miss her though. 367 00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:09,599 There she is. 368 00:17:09,599 --> 00:17:10,720 I haven't talked in a while. 369 00:17:11,599 --> 00:17:12,400 Yeah, we were all happy about that. 370 00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:15,759 There were some stabby, stabby things happening and I got real freaked out. 371 00:17:16,640 --> 00:17:19,279 Reminds me of a time when I was a pirate. 372 00:17:19,279 --> 00:17:21,759 And she goes off on a diatribe a bow when she was a pirate. 373 00:17:23,039 --> 00:17:23,839 Sounds right. 374 00:17:23,839 --> 00:17:24,960 That does sound like her. 375 00:17:25,360 --> 00:17:28,640 She's really small and I'm really big and I just kind of go over and like 376 00:17:29,279 --> 00:17:31,920 lay down like when a big dog kind of like lays on you 377 00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:34,480 and just kind of like crush her to the ground and just lay there. 378 00:17:35,840 --> 00:17:36,559 What are you doing? 379 00:17:38,319 --> 00:17:39,440 I muffle her with my fur. 380 00:17:41,920 --> 00:17:44,079 Still allowing her to breathe, of course, just no more talking. 381 00:17:44,079 --> 00:17:48,319 Okay, what's Thaddeus and Flint and Nularaaaa and Donnie doing? 382 00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:50,880 I mean, I guess just because you cast the spell 383 00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:53,759 doesn't mean you have to now follow up with questions. 384 00:17:53,759 --> 00:17:54,640 You don't. 385 00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:56,720 He just goes zone of truth and then goes. 386 00:17:58,720 --> 00:18:01,920 But he probably doesn't say zone of truth in game, right? 387 00:18:01,920 --> 00:18:03,520 He just cast a spell. 388 00:18:03,520 --> 00:18:04,320 We don't even know. 389 00:18:04,320 --> 00:18:05,840 There's a verbal component to it. 390 00:18:05,840 --> 00:18:06,960 So he would have said something. 391 00:18:07,600 --> 00:18:08,560 Oh, what did you say? 392 00:18:08,560 --> 00:18:09,600 That's what I want to know. 393 00:18:09,600 --> 00:18:10,160 Yeah, me too. 394 00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:18,160 Zonus of truth is the classic, the classic utterance. 395 00:18:18,160 --> 00:18:20,720 We always make the same jokes and I fucking love it. 396 00:18:20,720 --> 00:18:21,759 Did you say lamb? 397 00:18:21,759 --> 00:18:22,400 I love that. 398 00:18:23,759 --> 00:18:24,799 Ah, lamb. 399 00:18:27,519 --> 00:18:28,559 We're awesome. 400 00:18:28,559 --> 00:18:29,839 Fuck, I don't know what to ask. 401 00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:32,319 Tom's having some serious regret here. 402 00:18:32,319 --> 00:18:33,759 Okay, well, it's okay. 403 00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:40,240 Okay, guys, we have to get out of this fucking tower. 404 00:18:40,240 --> 00:18:41,519 We have to get Iskander 405 00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:45,200 and I'm terrified now that I'm going to hurt someone else. 406 00:18:46,480 --> 00:18:49,360 Trust me, we won't hurt anybody. 407 00:18:50,240 --> 00:18:51,360 We won't let that happen. 408 00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:57,200 Okay, I mean, I just, I can't live with myself now. 409 00:18:58,640 --> 00:19:01,120 Just if something happens, just stop me. 410 00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:03,200 However you have to. 411 00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:06,800 Okay, so where do we go? 412 00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:07,760 And this is awkward, 413 00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:09,680 but I really need to take a healing potion 414 00:19:09,680 --> 00:19:11,120 because I'm going to fucking die. 415 00:19:12,160 --> 00:19:16,240 I have like one sixth hit points. 416 00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:18,240 You don't look so good. 417 00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:19,839 I mean, aside from the fact that you're all 418 00:19:20,640 --> 00:19:24,000 weird about your stagger thing here. 419 00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:27,279 And she tosses you a rare healing potion, 420 00:19:27,279 --> 00:19:29,599 which was the 8d4 plus eight. 421 00:19:30,720 --> 00:19:32,400 Well, how is everyone else? 422 00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:34,960 I definitely need to take my uncommon. 423 00:19:34,960 --> 00:19:36,720 What's an uncommon I think? 424 00:19:36,720 --> 00:19:39,759 4d4 plus four is uncommon. 425 00:19:39,759 --> 00:19:41,359 Everybody's drinking their potions. 426 00:19:42,319 --> 00:19:44,319 I'm still not great, guys, but it's okay. 427 00:19:44,319 --> 00:19:46,720 All right, do we have to go to this elevator? 428 00:19:46,799 --> 00:19:48,799 Like, let's like, we have this. 429 00:19:49,839 --> 00:19:52,640 Do we have the time sand thingy? 430 00:19:52,640 --> 00:19:54,079 The white shimmering hourglass? 431 00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:57,120 I guess you're a wolf still. 432 00:19:57,120 --> 00:19:59,120 No, I just keep forgetting the word for hourglass. 433 00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:01,680 I mean, yes, I'm a wolf. 434 00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:02,319 I'm stupid. 435 00:20:05,039 --> 00:20:05,759 What does it do? 436 00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:08,160 Well, is there one of those? 437 00:20:09,360 --> 00:20:11,039 Like, let's go to the teleport thing. 438 00:20:11,039 --> 00:20:12,799 That has the hourglass on it. 439 00:20:12,799 --> 00:20:14,319 Yeah, and press it and see what it does 440 00:20:14,319 --> 00:20:15,759 now that we have it in our possession. 441 00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:17,440 Good idea. 442 00:20:17,440 --> 00:20:19,200 Because last time we just, like, 443 00:20:19,200 --> 00:20:21,759 felt a wave of power, but it didn't do anything. 444 00:20:21,759 --> 00:20:23,440 I get up off of flamekins. 445 00:20:24,480 --> 00:20:26,559 And I say, you can ride on my back if you want to. 446 00:20:26,559 --> 00:20:28,480 That was pretty, that was mean of me. 447 00:20:28,480 --> 00:20:29,920 Yeah, yeah, that's sweet. 448 00:20:29,920 --> 00:20:31,759 My legs are getting tired. 449 00:20:32,879 --> 00:20:34,079 Do you need healing potion? 450 00:20:34,079 --> 00:20:35,279 I hand her a yellow potion. 451 00:20:35,279 --> 00:20:36,319 I already drank one. 452 00:20:36,319 --> 00:20:36,960 I drank it. 453 00:20:37,519 --> 00:20:39,200 Yellow potion, you dink. 454 00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:40,160 No, I drank it. 455 00:20:40,160 --> 00:20:40,799 I'm okay. 456 00:20:40,799 --> 00:20:41,359 I'm good. 457 00:20:41,359 --> 00:20:41,920 You sure? 458 00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:42,240 Yeah. 459 00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:43,039 Okay, well, I got this. 460 00:20:43,039 --> 00:20:43,680 We need it, man. 461 00:20:43,680 --> 00:20:44,799 You just let me down, your buddy. 462 00:20:46,559 --> 00:20:47,119 Thanks, though. 463 00:20:47,119 --> 00:20:49,759 I mean, I had one and I drank it. 464 00:20:49,759 --> 00:20:50,879 Maybe, maybe next time. 465 00:20:52,240 --> 00:20:54,319 Oh, you're so funny. 466 00:20:54,319 --> 00:20:55,759 What a time for a prank. 467 00:20:58,319 --> 00:20:59,279 You're all murderous. 468 00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:03,759 You all crowd around in the teleporter area 469 00:21:04,879 --> 00:21:06,319 and you press the hourglass 470 00:21:07,839 --> 00:21:10,079 and you feel the same wave of energy. 471 00:21:10,079 --> 00:21:11,680 And then the bright light comes 472 00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:13,920 where before it was like a, you know, 473 00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:15,599 it was like it didn't let you go through. 474 00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:19,440 But now that you are holding the hourglass, 475 00:21:19,440 --> 00:21:20,720 the bright light comes 476 00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:25,520 and you are teleported into dark room. 477 00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:28,400 As you enter this room, 478 00:21:29,360 --> 00:21:31,600 lamps on the walls activate 479 00:21:32,320 --> 00:21:34,160 and provide bright light within the room 480 00:21:34,160 --> 00:21:37,200 and you see the bodies of three dead cultists 481 00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:38,160 on the floor here. 482 00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:45,040 Hey there, I'm your Dungeon Master Russ More. 483 00:21:45,039 --> 00:21:48,879 Thanks for joining us for episode 56 of Dumbgeons and Dragons. 484 00:21:49,440 --> 00:21:50,159 What was that? 485 00:21:50,799 --> 00:21:53,039 If you enjoy what we're doing with this show 486 00:21:53,039 --> 00:21:56,319 and you can support us through a monthly monetary pledge, 487 00:21:56,319 --> 00:21:58,480 we invite you to join us on Patreon, 488 00:21:58,480 --> 00:22:00,159 where for $1 per month, 489 00:22:00,159 --> 00:22:03,279 you're definitely absolutely 100% helping 490 00:22:03,279 --> 00:22:05,519 make this show better with every episode. 491 00:22:05,519 --> 00:22:08,000 But also you get access to a whole backlog 492 00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:09,519 of monthly bonus episodes, 493 00:22:09,519 --> 00:22:11,759 plus new ones on the 15th of every month, 494 00:22:11,759 --> 00:22:14,000 where we're playing a thriller, horror, 495 00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:17,920 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510 00:22:45,840 --> 00:22:48,960 What you can do is share a link to your favourite episode 511 00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:52,320 or just to the show in general on social media. 512 00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:54,000 Talk about us to your friends and family 513 00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:56,640 or write a review for us on Apple Podcasts, 514 00:22:56,640 --> 00:22:58,800 Stitcher or wherever else you can write reviews. 515 00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:01,200 There's some links down in the description there. 516 00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:02,960 Every little bit helps get us out 517 00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:04,080 in front of more people 518 00:23:04,080 --> 00:23:06,880 who will hopefully love the show as much as you do. 519 00:23:06,960 --> 00:23:09,680 All of our social media links and more about us 520 00:23:09,680 --> 00:23:12,080 and the show can be found at dumbdragons.com. 521 00:23:12,080 --> 00:23:13,680 So go check out the website 522 00:23:13,680 --> 00:23:15,840 and join, follow or like where you can today. 523 00:23:15,840 --> 00:23:18,480 And thanks to Sirenscape for some of the amazing atmosphere. 524 00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:20,640 Make sure you check them out at sirenscape.com 525 00:23:20,640 --> 00:23:22,080 to bring your games to life. 526 00:23:22,080 --> 00:23:23,280 Links for everything mentioned today 527 00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:24,960 can be found in the description. 528 00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:27,360 The next episode will be out Wednesday, October 10th. 529 00:23:27,360 --> 00:23:29,200 So let's get back to it. 530 00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:30,960 Have a great week. 531 00:23:30,960 --> 00:23:31,760 We'll talk soon. 532 00:23:36,960 --> 00:23:39,120 Lamps on the walls activate 533 00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:41,680 and provide bright light within the room. 534 00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:44,720 And you see the bodies of three dead cultists 535 00:23:44,720 --> 00:23:45,680 on the floor here. 536 00:23:46,240 --> 00:23:48,480 One of them has clearly been stabbed 537 00:23:49,120 --> 00:23:50,800 but you see a trail of blood 538 00:23:51,360 --> 00:23:54,240 running from this room down a hallway. 539 00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:56,800 I felt on my nose. 540 00:23:56,800 --> 00:23:59,360 Actually, Nularaaaa, can you go first? 541 00:23:59,360 --> 00:23:59,600 Yeah. 542 00:24:00,240 --> 00:24:02,240 It's just easier to keep an eye on you. 543 00:24:02,240 --> 00:24:03,040 You get it. 544 00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:03,840 I do. 545 00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:04,960 I go first. 546 00:24:04,960 --> 00:24:09,039 I assume, hopefully, towards my boy Iskander. 547 00:24:09,039 --> 00:24:11,279 I mean, he's not my boy we've never met, but you know. 548 00:24:12,000 --> 00:24:12,559 Yeah. 549 00:24:12,559 --> 00:24:15,920 I mean, you know, for all intents and purposes, he's our boy. 550 00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:16,799 Okay. 551 00:24:16,799 --> 00:24:19,279 So Nularaaaa, as you head down this hallway. 552 00:24:19,279 --> 00:24:21,920 And we are keeping very close tabs on her, correct? 553 00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:23,600 And we like we're walking with her. 554 00:24:24,559 --> 00:24:26,720 But we just want her to be in front 555 00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:28,240 so that she can be seen at all times 556 00:24:28,240 --> 00:24:30,640 and not stab anybody in the back or whatever. 557 00:24:30,640 --> 00:24:32,559 The hallway itself is five feet wide 558 00:24:32,559 --> 00:24:34,559 so it's single file down the hallway. 559 00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:38,240 But Nularaaaa, you are first one to the base 560 00:24:38,240 --> 00:24:41,440 and it opens up into another large room. 561 00:24:42,160 --> 00:24:45,840 And you see that as the lamps illuminate 562 00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:49,360 as you light down the hallway and into this room 563 00:24:49,360 --> 00:24:51,519 blood streaks the floor here, 564 00:24:51,519 --> 00:24:54,480 including the smeared trail leading back up 565 00:24:54,480 --> 00:24:56,079 to the chamber where you came 566 00:24:56,079 --> 00:24:59,039 and a second trail of bloody boot prints 567 00:24:59,039 --> 00:25:01,600 heading up the corridor to the north. 568 00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:05,040 Standing amid the gore are three humanoid figures, 569 00:25:05,040 --> 00:25:08,400 two that look like misshapen statues of clay and stone 570 00:25:08,400 --> 00:25:11,760 and one appearing as a humanoid made of flame. 571 00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:13,680 Oh, these are all statues. 572 00:25:14,400 --> 00:25:16,400 I mean, probably not for long, right, guys? 573 00:25:18,720 --> 00:25:20,640 Well, it's magical world we're in. 574 00:25:20,640 --> 00:25:21,280 Who knows? 575 00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:24,800 Uh, Kate, while I do the classic. 576 00:25:27,040 --> 00:25:29,760 Where I hold up my hand with the fist so everyone stops. 577 00:25:30,400 --> 00:25:31,759 Does that mean you're going to stab us? 578 00:25:34,559 --> 00:25:37,119 No, it's when she starts moving her hand back and forth. 579 00:25:38,480 --> 00:25:39,839 It's stab or hand job. 580 00:25:39,839 --> 00:25:40,720 Oh, boy. 581 00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:44,559 It's a dangerous game we play called stab or hand job. 582 00:25:45,680 --> 00:25:46,319 Oh, boy. 583 00:25:48,319 --> 00:25:50,799 Guys, there's blood everywhere in there 584 00:25:51,599 --> 00:25:54,240 and three statues, I guess. 585 00:25:54,240 --> 00:25:57,359 One is like a flame person 586 00:25:57,360 --> 00:26:02,480 and then the other two are just like big misshapen blob creatures. 587 00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:04,240 I mean, realistically, 588 00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:06,720 they're probably going to turn into real people we're going to fight. 589 00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:08,880 I just wanted to warn you before we went in there. 590 00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:10,000 All right. 591 00:26:10,000 --> 00:26:10,880 Thanks for the heads up. 592 00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:12,560 So I'm going in. 593 00:26:12,560 --> 00:26:13,600 We all OK with that? 594 00:26:14,640 --> 00:26:16,160 There's nowhere else to go. 595 00:26:16,160 --> 00:26:16,800 OK. 596 00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:18,160 And I enter the room. 597 00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:21,280 As you step foot into the room, 598 00:26:21,280 --> 00:26:25,840 the earth elementals and the fire elemental begin to move. 599 00:26:25,920 --> 00:26:29,440 Move and begin moving towards you 600 00:26:29,440 --> 00:26:32,400 in a fashion that looks like they want to take a swing at you. 601 00:26:34,240 --> 00:26:35,200 Roll for initiative. 602 00:26:36,080 --> 00:26:37,280 Thaddeus is up first. 603 00:26:38,880 --> 00:26:39,920 Do it, Thaddeus. 604 00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:44,000 How far away from Newlar are these guys? 605 00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:47,680 15 feet to the closest one, 25 feet to the fire one, 606 00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:48,960 which is farthest away. 607 00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:50,160 And how big is this room? 608 00:26:51,120 --> 00:26:54,560 It is 40 feet by 40 feet. 609 00:26:54,560 --> 00:26:55,600 So it's a big old room. 610 00:26:56,320 --> 00:26:57,840 It's a big old square room. 611 00:26:58,960 --> 00:26:59,440 OK. 612 00:26:59,440 --> 00:27:01,120 Right where the first guys are there, 613 00:27:01,120 --> 00:27:05,840 I'm going to cast Russ's favorite fucking spell, 614 00:27:05,840 --> 00:27:06,960 Cloud of Daggers. 615 00:27:08,160 --> 00:27:08,960 That's fun. 616 00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:10,240 Haven't had that in a while. 617 00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:13,920 I guess because there's been no song kitty in a while. 618 00:27:15,760 --> 00:27:20,080 So this will be right on top of them sort of thing. 619 00:27:20,960 --> 00:27:21,280 Sure. 620 00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:23,440 On the start of their turn, 621 00:27:23,519 --> 00:27:26,000 if they're in the range, which they will be 622 00:27:26,000 --> 00:27:27,600 because it's the start of their turn, 623 00:27:27,600 --> 00:27:30,240 they will take 4d4 slashing damage. 624 00:27:30,240 --> 00:27:31,440 All right. 625 00:27:31,440 --> 00:27:35,440 Then it is Flameykin's turn unless Thaddeus is doing anything else. 626 00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:40,960 Believe he can only utter words of encouragement past that point. 627 00:27:41,680 --> 00:27:43,120 Describe the room as you enter. 628 00:27:43,120 --> 00:27:46,799 There's an immediate hallway that goes like off to the left 629 00:27:46,799 --> 00:27:49,120 as you enter the room and there to your right. 630 00:27:50,559 --> 00:27:52,799 Just to describe that there is a table 631 00:27:52,799 --> 00:27:55,039 and there is a table in one corner 632 00:27:55,039 --> 00:27:57,919 and two longer tables with papers and stuff on them 633 00:27:57,919 --> 00:28:00,559 towards the back of the room as you enter. 634 00:28:01,440 --> 00:28:05,680 Flameykin's slides in and under people 635 00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:08,079 as she was probably nearer to the back there 636 00:28:08,079 --> 00:28:10,399 and she was on me here. 637 00:28:10,399 --> 00:28:11,279 She's just OK. 638 00:28:11,279 --> 00:28:14,559 She's just riding you and she lets forth an acid splash. 639 00:28:14,559 --> 00:28:17,599 No, I do not consent to this. 640 00:28:17,599 --> 00:28:17,919 What? 641 00:28:18,720 --> 00:28:22,159 Actually, you did offer so I did when we got in, 642 00:28:22,160 --> 00:28:24,720 but I'm not going to ride into battle with her. 643 00:28:24,720 --> 00:28:26,480 No, she's on top of you. 644 00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:27,519 You said she's on you. 645 00:28:27,519 --> 00:28:31,040 She's riding on top of you, throwing acid bubbles. 646 00:28:31,840 --> 00:28:34,080 She's like, we got to do this together now, bud. 647 00:28:34,080 --> 00:28:35,200 She singes my fur. 648 00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:36,240 I'm going to be pissed. 649 00:28:36,240 --> 00:28:36,740 Yep. 650 00:28:37,840 --> 00:28:40,160 One target must make a dexterity saving throw, 651 00:28:40,160 --> 00:28:41,759 which it does not make. 652 00:28:41,759 --> 00:28:48,560 And then it's going to take 12 acid damage. 653 00:28:49,359 --> 00:28:52,480 And then it's one of the Earthstone guy's turn. 654 00:28:52,480 --> 00:28:54,319 So he takes how much damage from you? 655 00:28:55,519 --> 00:28:56,480 Let's find out. 656 00:28:56,480 --> 00:28:56,960 Soorty Mcdagger's. 657 00:28:57,839 --> 00:29:00,319 Soorty Mcdagger's himself. 658 00:29:00,319 --> 00:29:02,000 Feels good, doesn't it, Russ? 659 00:29:02,000 --> 00:29:02,720 Feels good. 660 00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:03,200 I like it. 661 00:29:04,159 --> 00:29:07,759 When it comes, when a cloud of daggers comes to fruition. 662 00:29:07,759 --> 00:29:08,259 Right. 663 00:29:09,839 --> 00:29:10,319 All right. 664 00:29:10,319 --> 00:29:11,759 So that is 10 damage. 665 00:29:13,279 --> 00:29:16,720 It just rushes forward and slam attacks. 666 00:29:17,680 --> 00:29:18,880 I'll say Nulara and Flint. 667 00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:21,680 Get a slam attack each. 668 00:29:21,680 --> 00:29:22,640 Those are slamma jamma. 669 00:29:23,360 --> 00:29:24,720 That's a 12 and 11. 670 00:29:24,720 --> 00:29:26,240 So I don't think it really matters who. 671 00:29:26,240 --> 00:29:27,680 I touched your dice. 672 00:29:27,680 --> 00:29:29,120 Oh, god damn it. 673 00:29:29,120 --> 00:29:30,880 This is what you've been doing this whole time. 674 00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:31,680 Get out of here. 675 00:29:32,960 --> 00:29:33,839 Get out of here. 676 00:29:34,720 --> 00:29:36,079 Stop ruining my dice. 677 00:29:36,079 --> 00:29:37,360 Keep ruining his dice. 678 00:29:37,360 --> 00:29:39,200 Keep ruining his goddamn dice. 679 00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:44,720 So one of these elementals makes a big swing 680 00:29:44,720 --> 00:29:47,279 and you duck out of the way and it is your turn. 681 00:29:48,160 --> 00:29:50,799 And sorry, just to be clear, we walked in 682 00:29:52,319 --> 00:29:58,559 and immediately to our left is the only exit from the room. 683 00:29:59,200 --> 00:30:00,400 Is an open hallway. 684 00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:05,279 And is the elemental, did it slam in between me and that exit? 685 00:30:06,160 --> 00:30:09,039 No, it's still over top of you, in front of you. 686 00:30:09,600 --> 00:30:11,839 It swung over your head and you ducked out of the way. 687 00:30:11,840 --> 00:30:12,340 Okay. 688 00:30:13,360 --> 00:30:14,560 Well, I mean, it's right there. 689 00:30:14,560 --> 00:30:17,120 So I'm gonna take a swing at it. 690 00:30:17,120 --> 00:30:21,360 But also, guys, we've tried to fight these before 691 00:30:21,360 --> 00:30:23,440 and it doesn't really go great. 692 00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:27,120 So I say, let's just try and get through 693 00:30:27,120 --> 00:30:28,960 and get down that hallway. 694 00:30:28,960 --> 00:30:29,600 What do you think? 695 00:30:30,400 --> 00:30:33,200 This is what I'm saying as I am about to stab 696 00:30:33,200 --> 00:30:34,800 because I'm a good multitasker. 697 00:30:35,520 --> 00:30:38,320 I mean, I'm ready to ride like the cavalry into battle, 698 00:30:38,320 --> 00:30:39,760 but whatever you think. 699 00:30:39,759 --> 00:30:42,400 That's a 25. 700 00:30:43,519 --> 00:30:44,480 25 will hit. 701 00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:45,200 Okay. 702 00:30:45,200 --> 00:30:47,119 I reach up and I just grab her pant leg 703 00:30:47,119 --> 00:30:49,839 and I just really slowly like pull her off my back. 704 00:30:50,720 --> 00:30:52,160 16 damage. 705 00:30:53,359 --> 00:30:53,859 Okay. 706 00:30:54,960 --> 00:31:00,240 Then I'm going to try and get it again as a 22. 707 00:31:01,680 --> 00:31:05,279 That is 14 damage. 708 00:31:06,640 --> 00:31:07,119 All right. 709 00:31:07,120 --> 00:31:11,360 So your two big slices, they cut in 710 00:31:11,360 --> 00:31:13,760 and they don't look like they do quite as much damage 711 00:31:13,760 --> 00:31:15,200 as you think they should. 712 00:31:15,200 --> 00:31:15,920 Sounds right. 713 00:31:17,600 --> 00:31:18,100 Okay. 714 00:31:18,720 --> 00:31:23,600 Then Donnie's gonna try and recharge. 715 00:31:24,560 --> 00:31:25,280 Fails. 716 00:31:25,920 --> 00:31:26,880 What else can he do? 717 00:31:26,880 --> 00:31:29,600 Why not bite a big pile of dirt, Donnie? 718 00:31:29,600 --> 00:31:30,100 Why not? 719 00:31:31,360 --> 00:31:32,000 Why not? 720 00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:32,560 I mean- 721 00:31:32,560 --> 00:31:33,520 16. 722 00:31:33,520 --> 00:31:35,120 Did just suggest a run, but- 723 00:31:35,120 --> 00:31:37,120 Yeah, but they're like right there. 724 00:31:37,120 --> 00:31:37,920 It's true. 725 00:31:37,920 --> 00:31:38,480 It's true. 726 00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:39,680 16 does not hit. 727 00:31:39,680 --> 00:31:40,180 Okay. 728 00:31:41,440 --> 00:31:45,840 Donnie takes a bite and it glints off the stone of this elemental. 729 00:31:45,840 --> 00:31:50,240 And then it is the fire elemental's turn. 730 00:31:50,240 --> 00:31:54,880 So it rushes forward to Thea and Flamikins 731 00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:58,320 and moves to, it just moves to touch you. 732 00:31:58,320 --> 00:31:59,840 Ooh, touchy. 733 00:32:00,480 --> 00:32:05,040 That's going to be an 18 for Thea and Flamikins. 734 00:32:05,200 --> 00:32:08,000 And a 17 for Flamikins. 735 00:32:08,000 --> 00:32:09,519 Yeah, that's gonna work. 736 00:32:09,519 --> 00:32:10,319 That's gonna- 737 00:32:10,319 --> 00:32:12,639 Definite touching happening. 738 00:32:12,639 --> 00:32:15,039 Syngy, syngy touching. 739 00:32:15,039 --> 00:32:16,240 Syngy, syngy touching. 740 00:32:16,240 --> 00:32:17,440 It's gonna be hot, you guys. 741 00:32:18,079 --> 00:32:18,639 So hot. 742 00:32:21,519 --> 00:32:22,000 Cause it is. 743 00:32:22,799 --> 00:32:26,960 You're going to take 11 fire damage and you are ignited. 744 00:32:27,839 --> 00:32:28,339 What? 745 00:32:29,519 --> 00:32:30,960 Well, she's covered in fur. 746 00:32:30,960 --> 00:32:32,399 Like your fur is on fire. 747 00:32:32,400 --> 00:32:35,600 I thought you meant like ignited with a fiery passion to murder. 748 00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:37,040 Oh, that would have worked too. 749 00:32:37,040 --> 00:32:38,240 Yeah, that's possible too. 750 00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:42,720 Flamikins is going to take 12 damage and her clothes ignite as well. 751 00:32:43,759 --> 00:32:49,280 And if I'm still on fire my other turn, I continue to take damage. 752 00:32:49,280 --> 00:32:51,120 And then it is Flint's turn. 753 00:32:52,000 --> 00:32:55,680 So it didn't seem like traditional weapons did a whole lot there. 754 00:32:56,560 --> 00:32:59,759 So should we just disengage and run for it? 755 00:32:59,759 --> 00:33:01,120 I think it sounds like a good idea. 756 00:33:01,120 --> 00:33:02,800 I'm on fire, motherfucker. 757 00:33:02,800 --> 00:33:03,840 I mean, she's on fire. 758 00:33:05,600 --> 00:33:07,840 All right, yeah, let's do that. 759 00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:09,760 You're disengaging running down the hall. 760 00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:10,000 Yep. 761 00:33:10,560 --> 00:33:12,240 Okay, Thea's turn. 762 00:33:13,840 --> 00:33:16,080 Can I use my action to stop, drop, and roll? 763 00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:19,440 I mean, you've got a goblin on your back. 764 00:33:19,440 --> 00:33:20,240 Oh, do I? 765 00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:22,800 She'd be down with it too though, probably, cause she's also on fire. 766 00:33:22,800 --> 00:33:24,720 No, I pushed her off by her pant leg. 767 00:33:24,720 --> 00:33:27,120 Until a creature takes an action to douse the fire, 768 00:33:27,120 --> 00:33:29,920 the target takes 1d10 fire damage at the start of each of its turns. 769 00:33:29,920 --> 00:33:32,240 You're going to take the damage anyway, regardless. 770 00:33:33,200 --> 00:33:36,320 So you're going to take 1 fire damage. 771 00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:36,720 Damn it. 772 00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:40,960 But then if you are to douse it... 773 00:33:41,759 --> 00:33:43,039 I roll around on the ground. 774 00:33:43,039 --> 00:33:43,440 All right. 775 00:33:43,440 --> 00:33:44,000 Oh God! 776 00:33:44,720 --> 00:33:47,519 No, I had dragged her off of me by her pant leg. 777 00:33:47,519 --> 00:33:48,720 This is funnier this way. 778 00:33:48,720 --> 00:33:51,039 Okay, I'm going to take out what I did before. 779 00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:56,320 Yeah, well, and I successfully, hopefully, dousing both of our flames. 780 00:33:56,320 --> 00:33:59,440 I just roll all over her with no regard. 781 00:33:59,440 --> 00:34:01,759 She's like holding on, like as this is happening. 782 00:34:01,759 --> 00:34:02,259 Oh God! 783 00:34:02,559 --> 00:34:03,840 You douse the flames. 784 00:34:03,840 --> 00:34:05,360 And can I disengage? 785 00:34:05,360 --> 00:34:05,860 Yeah. 786 00:34:06,559 --> 00:34:07,680 And can I dash? 787 00:34:07,680 --> 00:34:08,079 Yes. 788 00:34:08,079 --> 00:34:08,800 I do those things. 789 00:34:08,800 --> 00:34:11,200 Well, you can make it with a run. 790 00:34:11,200 --> 00:34:12,079 Oh, I'm sure I can. 791 00:34:12,079 --> 00:34:13,920 I'm a very fast wolf and I drag. 792 00:34:14,639 --> 00:34:15,139 Yep. 793 00:34:15,920 --> 00:34:16,720 Thaddeus is up. 794 00:34:16,720 --> 00:34:18,000 Flame Echans is already out. 795 00:34:18,000 --> 00:34:19,679 I assume Thaddeus is doing the same. 796 00:34:20,559 --> 00:34:22,480 Nularaaaa and Donnie are still in the room 797 00:34:22,480 --> 00:34:27,760 and one of the earth elementals has a turn prior to your turn. 798 00:34:27,760 --> 00:34:30,560 So it is going to try to slam attack. 799 00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:32,400 One at Donnie, one at Nularaaaa. 800 00:34:35,520 --> 00:34:37,040 Can you not sing while I talk? 801 00:34:39,600 --> 00:34:44,160 25 to Nularaaaa, 24 to Donnie. 802 00:34:44,160 --> 00:34:46,960 Okay, well that'll hit both of us. 803 00:34:46,960 --> 00:34:51,200 Nularaaaa, you are going to take 16 bludgeoning damage 804 00:34:51,200 --> 00:34:53,440 or halfsies for your armor stuff. 805 00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:58,639 And Donnie will take 15 bludgeoning damage. 806 00:34:59,360 --> 00:35:00,720 And then it's your turn. 807 00:35:00,720 --> 00:35:04,320 Then I'm going to try to get out of there. 808 00:35:04,320 --> 00:35:06,000 You know, the old get out of there. 809 00:35:06,000 --> 00:35:06,960 Classic move. 810 00:35:06,960 --> 00:35:08,000 The old get out of there. 811 00:35:08,000 --> 00:35:10,639 So you take that hit and then both of you disengage 812 00:35:10,639 --> 00:35:11,440 and enter the hall. 813 00:35:12,800 --> 00:35:14,559 So as you enter the hall, 814 00:35:14,559 --> 00:35:17,360 there's immediately a staircase that goes directly down 815 00:35:18,320 --> 00:35:21,119 and a door that goes off to the left. 816 00:35:21,119 --> 00:35:25,039 Which way do you run as the first one through that direction? 817 00:35:25,039 --> 00:35:28,000 Which way is the trail of blood going? 818 00:35:28,559 --> 00:35:29,279 Quarter to the north. 819 00:35:29,279 --> 00:35:30,400 So it goes down the stairs. 820 00:35:31,519 --> 00:35:34,880 Okay, let's hustle down those stairs. 821 00:35:36,400 --> 00:35:38,799 All of you head down the stairs and you descend 822 00:35:39,759 --> 00:35:45,039 to a walkway that appears to stretch across infinite space. 823 00:35:46,079 --> 00:35:47,279 The walls disappear. 824 00:35:47,920 --> 00:35:51,600 Thousands of stars twinkle in an unfamiliar constellation 825 00:35:51,600 --> 00:35:55,519 and meteors strike through the vastness above and below the path. 826 00:35:56,160 --> 00:35:58,880 Just past the base of the stairs, 827 00:35:58,880 --> 00:36:02,560 a door framed by nothingness rises from the path. 828 00:36:02,560 --> 00:36:03,920 50 feet beyond that, 829 00:36:03,920 --> 00:36:08,320 the path meets an intersection with another door straight ahead. 830 00:36:17,280 --> 00:36:29,519 Music in today's episode was by Kavin McLeod of incompetech.filmmusic.io. 831 00:36:30,240 --> 00:36:32,000 You bite into the scabbard. 832 00:36:33,680 --> 00:36:35,680 And find that her belt is really well made 833 00:36:35,680 --> 00:36:37,519 and you just end up dragging her by her waist. 834 00:36:40,240 --> 00:36:41,280 What kind of damage? 835 00:36:42,800 --> 00:36:43,360 Not cold. 836 00:36:45,120 --> 00:36:47,040 You took four not cold damage. 837 00:36:48,000 --> 00:36:48,880 Not cold damage. 838 00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:51,440 I kind of like, 839 00:36:52,720 --> 00:36:55,440 just having a fight with a giant snake on our bed is epic. 840 00:36:57,600 --> 00:37:01,040 That was horrible hand motions for us to be doing back there. 841 00:37:01,040 --> 00:37:02,240 I can't see our video. 842 00:37:03,200 --> 00:37:04,800 No, our video is completely black. 843 00:37:04,800 --> 00:37:05,519 It'll be interesting. 844 00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:10,800 Yeah, so I use my axe to cut off her belt. 845 00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:14,320 It's the most proper cutting tool. 846 00:37:15,039 --> 00:37:17,440 This is a precision move. 847 00:37:17,440 --> 00:37:19,760 I'm going to stop right there. 848 00:37:21,760 --> 00:37:22,480 Do I have to? 849 00:37:22,480 --> 00:37:24,480 Can't we just put me at the bottom automatically? 850 00:37:24,480 --> 00:37:26,240 No, because I feel good about it this time. 851 00:37:26,240 --> 00:37:26,559 Do you? 852 00:37:26,559 --> 00:37:27,600 I'm going to use your dice. 853 00:37:28,240 --> 00:37:29,519 I had a really bad roll. 854 00:37:29,519 --> 00:37:31,519 So people, I'm not going to be first. 855 00:37:31,519 --> 00:37:32,160 I had 12. 856 00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:39,280 Sorry, six plus one initiative. 857 00:37:39,280 --> 00:37:41,600 Well, that's right. 858 00:37:41,600 --> 00:37:42,400 Looky here. 859 00:37:43,200 --> 00:37:47,760 Guys, I'm broken. 860 00:37:47,760 --> 00:37:48,960 I'm bad luck. 861 00:37:48,960 --> 00:37:52,800 How far away from new are these guys? 862 00:37:59,280 --> 00:38:02,000 I don't know what that sound effect was, but I liked it. 863 00:38:02,000 --> 00:38:03,360 Earth glides. 864 00:38:04,800 --> 00:38:06,960 So it glides along the stone. 865 00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:09,440 No, that doesn't. 866 00:38:09,440 --> 00:38:11,360 Does it say like radical? 867 00:38:11,360 --> 00:38:14,000 And it throws up like some hand symbols as it does it? 868 00:38:14,000 --> 00:38:14,960 Hang ten. 869 00:38:14,960 --> 00:38:19,599 Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.